[re] senior quotes.

"Finding a senior quote for the yearbook at first seemed like an easy task." - Courtney Winterbauer.
    Searching for the perfect senior quote is quite a daunting task. Searched far, and wide yet there was nothing fitting. It felt dumb not to put any quote at all, putting a random quote, or a generic one. I wanted something original, something that I could call mine. Several days past and I was still at square one. I wanted something cool, something that I could call mine.
"Googling quotes on 'LIFE' and 'SUCCESS' or 'FUTURE,' 'HUMANITY' and 'SOCIETY' seemed easy yet the lists went on and on and on. On many levels each quote felt inspiring yet something was missing."
Like real talk. Googling things such as "inspirational" got me good results but none of them represented who I was. I did not want to quote anyone either like Ghandi or Abraham Lincoln but they have some really inspiring quotes.
   I yearned for something clever and original, yet I wanted to say "Yeah, that's me". I even looked through my music library to find lyrics that I liked. But lyrics can not be considered original because they are someone else's words. I looked through some poets and I remembered Robert Frost. He is the author of my favorite poem, the Road Not Taken. I decided to quote him but twist it a little to make it "original". I found it quite fitting. I found it clever and inspirational, and I liked its figurative meaning. It was perfect.

Fences

    Psychological fences do not have a definite definition nor will it be defined. Metaphorically, they represent a barrier to keep dangers out and values in. However, fences are not limited to physical objects or distinct objects. They can be built around values, morals, traits, and even beliefs. I believe everyone builds fences around themselves. Fences are built when people have social interactions with one another and "outsiders" as I shall call them, subconsciously influence us to create these fences. Everyone has some kind of fence to protect themselves; it is just a matter of whether you acknowledge your own personal fences. I believe all fences have a specific basis that contribute to other fences: morals, beliefs, and values.
    These three things are the basis for opinions, actions, and social interactions. Everything we do revolve around these three things. The moral fence keeps out the immoral subjects and the valuable morals in. Common things such as hurting others are considered outside of this fence, but outsiders may influence one to let things into their fences. Beliefs include, but not limited to, religion but we all believe in something. It is how we continue tolerating the pressures of life and society. Values come in wide range of things but knowing your values well is considered mature. I believe that is what separates a immature person and a mature person. These three things subconsciously contribute to everything we do.
   Fences are a subconscious barrier that we reinforce every now and then. The things that you choose to let in and keep out are influenced by these three things and outsiders. Letting someone into your fences means you trust them with everything. You expect them to do things that will help you. Normally, I have my fences up, impervious of outsiders and their influence. Recently, I let someone in. They made me laugh. Happy. I was content with my life - I felt like I had everything in the world. Then they destroyed me inside out. They tore down everything I have built in my 17 years. It hurt. These past couple years. wrecked. Normally, I would just laugh. "What a boondoggle!"
   It really hurt.

[Free] personal update.

    I am currently in Mrs. Playsted’s fifth period current life class. We are currently going through the depression unit. There are three or four types of depression - the number of depression seems really irrelevant considering the seriousness of my problem. I fear that I may be mildly depressed for several weeks. In my free time, I try to trace the events in past several weeks to find the origin of my problem but my answer remains unknown. Friends and music have been a temporary escape from my depression but it does not provide any kind solution. I understand why depressed people resort to drugs to relieve themselves of their depression. It’s an escape but drugs will not fix the problem. I want to blame others for my depression but no one around me has recently changed. It’s me. Sometimes, I feel like no one will miss me if I just left or they will forget about me after a week. I feel insignificant at times and how small my value is compared to everyone else. Stress from college admission and school accumulates inside me and I feel like there’s no escape from this. I have only considered suicide once and I blogged about it in my last free post. I feel like no one will read this; or care about my problem. I’ll be called a coward by my friends but it is their way of cheering me up. It’ll work out. I’ll get over it. I’ll make sure it happens.

[Re] Teenagers.

    Adolescents experience feelings they will only feel for this period of time in their life. They have the unnecessary desire to rebel against the norm and doing illegal things such as drugs and drinking under aged may fuel their excitement. Perhaps they feel that “excitement” is “living the life” or “trendy” or “cool”. Lina brings up a good point once people start partying too hard and these things begin to define who they are.

However, once people begin to depend on drugs and alcohol, especially at this age, that's when I feel like it's become a problem. Why do we do this?

We are bored. That's one source of it. Plain and simple.

We are also trying to escape. We're all trying to get away from whatever is going on with our lives.

Recently in current life class, we finished the adolescence unit of the class. I’m sure many people have been aware of the stages of adolescence but was not fully aware of it. Peer pressure seems to be the most influential force that drives adolescents to do drugs or drink under aged. It seems rather immature that they are inducing themselves to be under the influence and demanding independence at the same time. How can parents trust their kids with independence if they drink and do drugs unsupervised and irresponsibly? Some people that are resistant to this particular peer pressure are often called uptight because they will not loosen up. It’s amazing how drugs and alcohol can dramatically change a person.

[CE] Occupy goes global.

http://english.aljazeera.net//news/asia-pacific/2011/10/201110154143743457.html

    “Occupy” protests have expanded from local communities into a global protest. Protests from all over the world are breaking out and creating a unity between the people of foreign countries. These protests mutually ask for economic reform and They will relay a message to the sophisticated societies of the world: "We will peacefully demonstrate, talk and organize until we make it happen. It's time for us to unite; it's time for them to listen." They all have the same empty claims, but have no core or actual demand. Despite their lack of approach, they still demand some kind of economic reform.

Countries in Asia and Australia have broken out into protests. Protests in Japan's Tokyo, the Philippines' Manila, Taiwan's Taipei, South Korea's Seoul and China's Hong Kong have emerged from the depths of society. In Melborne, Australia, Australians witnessed their first “Occupy” protest and their activists claim that they also have the same democratic problems. One of the activists group expressed the percentage of population they represented by chanting “We are the 99 per cent” and wearing Guy Fawkes masks to express the anonymous group of individuals are not “famous”.

“Occupy” protests have also broken out in Europe and Africa, both demonstrating the capability of a weak but uniform interest. "What is happening in Greece now is the nightmare waiting other countries in the future," Real Democracy said in a statement.

"Solidarity is people's weapon."

[Free] So much writing.

Recently, these days has been shitty. I have the Abercrombie essay, three weekly posts, a six paragraph essay to write, editing my personal essays, finishing my UC application, start my resume; there’s just so much to do. We have a minimum of 1750 words due by Friday and hopefully, I will finish all my shit by the end of next week. So much for relaxing. A couple weeks ago, I even contemplated suicide for like five seconds. I felt like shit from stomach and eye pain, pressure from school and getting accepted into a good college. For those five seconds, I felt better. It was strange feeling; knowing if I left this world, I would be free from all the pain and pressure. Let me get this straight - I am NOT suicidal. I just never fully understood why people committed suicide as their escape from the pressure and the pain. In those five seconds, I felt liberated. Free, and the pressure was gone. I felt extremely light and the pain from the pressure in my shoulders subsided. I was amazed, that such a self-destructive thought can be so enlightening; I seriously felt at peace with myself. I feel like everyone should go through that thought process at least once in their life - it seems necessary to truly understand the value of life. I understood that despite my tiny existence, people may be affected if I just left. I understood that I was not alone. Then again, after that experience, I have been more lonely than ever before.

[RE] Stupid Ass Victims

This is a response post to Kelsey’s post about the BART incident.

I hated how this case turned into such a huge race thing. If a white man was in the situation as Grant, I think the same ending would have happened. Just like  in the whole Occupy Wall Street protests, people of color always want to be the victims. Stop being the victims!

Seriously, when will they stop? No offense but black people just do not know when to stop asking for sympathy. They believe they have the right to keep readdressing the issue of racism, but is that really the case? If Grant was Asian or Hispanic or Mexican or any other race than black, no one would even bring up the racism problem we have in America. Anyone that had the same record as Grant and imitated the same actions as he did, any officer would have been extremely defensive. How would he know he was not armed? All officers also sternly warn people to keep their hands where they can see them - they would not have used any force if you did so. Grant should have known better due to his records. The event also took place late at night, approximately 2 AM. Anyone would have been suspicious of what the hell he was doing at the BART station that late. We cannot deny the possibility that Officer Mehserle was not even aware of the record Grant had. He just acted accordingly so he could have shot anyone.